Smiling again!!

I am putting a smile back on my face. Taylor told me just yesterday that she has noticed a change in me. I said what kind of change...She said that "you smile more now". I took this as a compliment. I told her that I am happier now. My life is being controlled by me and only me and this makes me happy. She said "you don't yell at us as much any more"...your right Taylor I don't because I am finding my happy place more now and I don't need to yell. I am happy..."You have more patience mommy" I told her I was glad she had noticed because I have been working really hard at it!!

I guess that good things can come out of a bad situation. Things have calmed down alot. Mike has been picking the kids up on weekends and spending time with them...he's rude to me but I am glad he's taking them. So I hope you like my smile today and I am wearing it alot lately thanks to my family and friends who have given me their unconditional love and support... You will never know how much I appreciate all you have done for me...you know who you are!!

It's official...

Mike and I are officially seperated. He was served his papers yesterday and is currently not speaking to me. This is something I just don't understand. I did NOT do this to him. Yes I went to a lawyer and had the papers drawn up...however he did this to HIMSELF...He's the one who had an affair...he's the one who moved out...he's the one living with his girlfriend...and now he's not talking to me...Why is he so mad at me? I mean I really don't care that he's mad and hurt because I served him with seperation papers and now we have to go to court for custody...however did he just expect me to sit around and wait until he's done having his fun and crawl back to me?? I told him that if that's what he wanted then I was gonna take action...I guess he thought I was joking. I hope now he knows that I am serious. I am moving on with my life just like he is and he's gonna have to accept that!!! I am finally at peace with things and I hope for our kids sake that we can be friends...this might take a while but that is my goal. I WILL try my hardest to make sure this happens!! I don't see why two adults who are on relativly good terms can't try to keep things civil. Yes we have to go to mediation for child custody but I am sure he and I can come up with an agreement. I will never keep our children away from him. And I hope that he would not try to take them from me. Just wanted to get that off my chest...there's no one around to talk to right now...Sometimes it's nice to just vent...

FALL...

This morning when I stepped outside to let the dogs out I could smell FALL!! I just love the smell of FALL...The brisk air, the fireplaces...I just love it...The leaves are falling off the trees, and changing color...this has always been my favorite season...Except for the cooler weather. I like the cooler weather but not the COLD weather. It's the time where I can make my home made chili ( which I have made once already ) and watch football, and the kids love to get out their scooby mugs from Grandma and Grandpa Herrick and drink hot chocolate... I just LOVE IT!!!!